Dads and Daughters...Dynamic Duos

Character GPS

One thing we have observed from six years of working with youth is the principle that daughters really suffer, agonizingly suffer, when dads don't show them enough affection. Whether it's a hug, holding hands, high-fiving or spending quality time together, they starve for it. Affection and positive attention are necessary for a daughter to be able to thrive and not be depressed, vulnerable to wrong relationships, joining gangs for a sense of belonging or even being trafficked.

It is especially helpful for a father to know what their daughter's "love language" is, ie: Gary Chapman's book, "The Five Love Languages". If a daughter's "love language" is quality- time and dad is "too busy" with work, golf or other priorities, this becomes a recipe for disaster.

Also, knowing you and your daughter's Myers-Briggs Profiles can be extremely helpful. A Myers-Briggs "F=Feeling" daughter and a Myers-Briggs "T=Thinking" dad can be like the Titanic on it's way to the icberg. The "Thinking" dad will most likely be hyper-critical of the "Feeling" daughter and the daughter, ultra sensitive, will then certainly struggle with her self-esteem.

Sometimes, expressing your feelings through a poem can be helpful. Debbie wrote her father a poem when she was in high school, they had all struggled with the untimely death of her mom, and he framed that poem and it has been on his desk to this day. He is now 84! Little did we know that it would be so meaningful.

It is so important for a Father and his teenage daughter to stay connected by finding some common interest to share. Jeff experienced this with his daughter when he realized it was getting harder to relate as she entered her teenage years. He kept looking for the opportunity and was glad when she went out for cross-country.

Her running routine ended up being a nightly event and Jeff grabbed the opportunity to accompany her when she asked him to accompany her on her nightly runs which was cooler but dark which scared her. This served several purposes; he kept her safe, gave them some quality time together and helped keep Jeff and his daughter fit and healthy.

So, this Father's Day, let's show our dads appreciation and affection AND dads, please give some positive attention to your daughters to help them feel "Priceless", which is the way God made them to be.

Turn Dad's Day into "Dyad's" Day...A day celebrating the empowering dynamics between two superheros: dads and their "priceless" daughters!

As the Paul Simon song, "Father and Daughter", says,

"I'm gonna watch you shine
Gonna watch you grow
Gonna paint a sign
So you always know
As long as one and one is two
Ooh ooh
There could never be a father
Love his daughter more than I love you"

Your Friends at Character GPS,

Jeff & Debbie Cain


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